joke (not office friendly)

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joke (not office friendly)

Post  TurboSloth on 19th June 2010, 9:47 am

heard this on a jimmy carr dvd,went down well on the server.


Q: Whats the difference between Jam and Marmalade?
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Re: joke (not office friendly)

Post  TurboSloth on 19th June 2010, 9:48 am

A: You cant Marmalade your cock up someones ass!!! Smile
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Re: joke (not office friendly)

Post  Stinger on 19th June 2010, 1:58 pm

HAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM ROFL!!! HHAHAHAAHA I like that one!

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Re: joke (not office friendly)

Post  Death on 20th June 2010, 4:28 am

lol
Jimmy Carr is so funny!!!
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Re: joke (not office friendly)

Post  Stinger on 21st June 2010, 5:08 am

Another Joke. (Very funny!)

The Baby Elephant.

There was a guy who had been having chronic trouble in trying to get an erection. After weeks of frustration, he finally breaks down and goes to the doctor. The doctor gives him a thorough examination and finally makes the diagnosis.

"Well, there's good news and there's bad news," she says. "The bad news is that the muscles around your penis are deteriorating, and there is no cure."

The guy, on the verge of panic, finally regains his composure.

"So what's the good news?" he asks.

The doctor says, "There is an experimental treatment available, but there are no guarantees. It involves transplanting the muscles from a baby elephant's trunk into your penis. Would you like to try it?"

The guy thinks about it and finally says, "Well, the thought of going through life without being able to have sex is just too much for me. What have I got to lose? Let's do it."

So the doctor performs the operation.

A few weeks later, the guy takes his girlfriend out to a nice restaurant to celebrate his new equipment. While sitting at the table, he feels a stirring between his legs; it gets progressively worse until it reaches the point of being painful.

Seeking relief, he reaches down and unzips his fly to relieve some of the pressure.

Suddenly, his penis leaps free from his pants, slides over the tabletop and grabs a dinner roll, then returns to his pants again.

"Wow!" says his stunned girlfriend, "That was impressive! Can you do that again?"

Eyes watering and face flushed, he says, "Probably...But I don't know if I can fit another dinner roll up my ass!"

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Re: joke (not office friendly)

Post  TurboSloth on 21st June 2010, 5:16 am

hehe good one. Smile here"s an oldie but its good


Q: what did the constipated mathematician do?




A: sat down and worked it out with a pencil
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Re: joke (not office friendly)

Post  Bobman on 23rd June 2010, 6:49 am

I have a few jokes to share too

Q: Why r camels known as the ships of the desert?



A: Because they r all full of arabian seamen lol!
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Re: joke (not office friendly)

Post  Bobman on 23rd June 2010, 6:51 am

Q: Why do camels spit?


A: Because there r no good looking arabian women around pirat
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Re: joke (not office friendly)

Post  Death on 24th June 2010, 9:10 am

Why wasnt Jesus born in Australia?


Couldnt find three wise men or a virgin..

Thats for claiming the All Whites as Australasian!!!
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