joke (not office friendly)
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joke (not office friendly)
heard this on a jimmy carr dvd,went down well on the server.
Q: Whats the difference between Jam and Marmalade?
Q: Whats the difference between Jam and Marmalade?
TurboSloth- Clan member
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Re: joke (not office friendly)
A: You cant Marmalade your cock up someones ass!!!
TurboSloth- Clan member
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Re: joke (not office friendly)
HAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM ROFL!!! HHAHAHAAHA I like that one!
Stinger- Clan Leader
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Re: joke (not office friendly)
lol
Jimmy Carr is so funny!!!
Jimmy Carr is so funny!!!
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Re: joke (not office friendly)
Another Joke. (Very funny!)
The Baby Elephant.
There was a guy who had been having chronic trouble in trying to get an erection. After weeks of frustration, he finally breaks down and goes to the doctor. The doctor gives him a thorough examination and finally makes the diagnosis.
"Well, there's good news and there's bad news," she says. "The bad news is that the muscles around your penis are deteriorating, and there is no cure."
The guy, on the verge of panic, finally regains his composure.
"So what's the good news?" he asks.
The doctor says, "There is an experimental treatment available, but there are no guarantees. It involves transplanting the muscles from a baby elephant's trunk into your penis. Would you like to try it?"
The guy thinks about it and finally says, "Well, the thought of going through life without being able to have sex is just too much for me. What have I got to lose? Let's do it."
So the doctor performs the operation.
A few weeks later, the guy takes his girlfriend out to a nice restaurant to celebrate his new equipment. While sitting at the table, he feels a stirring between his legs; it gets progressively worse until it reaches the point of being painful.
Seeking relief, he reaches down and unzips his fly to relieve some of the pressure.
Suddenly, his penis leaps free from his pants, slides over the tabletop and grabs a dinner roll, then returns to his pants again.
"Wow!" says his stunned girlfriend, "That was impressive! Can you do that again?"
Eyes watering and face flushed, he says, "Probably...But I don't know if I can fit another dinner roll up my ass!"
The Baby Elephant.
There was a guy who had been having chronic trouble in trying to get an erection. After weeks of frustration, he finally breaks down and goes to the doctor. The doctor gives him a thorough examination and finally makes the diagnosis.
"Well, there's good news and there's bad news," she says. "The bad news is that the muscles around your penis are deteriorating, and there is no cure."
The guy, on the verge of panic, finally regains his composure.
"So what's the good news?" he asks.
The doctor says, "There is an experimental treatment available, but there are no guarantees. It involves transplanting the muscles from a baby elephant's trunk into your penis. Would you like to try it?"
The guy thinks about it and finally says, "Well, the thought of going through life without being able to have sex is just too much for me. What have I got to lose? Let's do it."
So the doctor performs the operation.
A few weeks later, the guy takes his girlfriend out to a nice restaurant to celebrate his new equipment. While sitting at the table, he feels a stirring between his legs; it gets progressively worse until it reaches the point of being painful.
Seeking relief, he reaches down and unzips his fly to relieve some of the pressure.
Suddenly, his penis leaps free from his pants, slides over the tabletop and grabs a dinner roll, then returns to his pants again.
"Wow!" says his stunned girlfriend, "That was impressive! Can you do that again?"
Eyes watering and face flushed, he says, "Probably...But I don't know if I can fit another dinner roll up my ass!"
Stinger- Clan Leader
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Re: joke (not office friendly)
hehe good one. here"s an oldie but its good
Q: what did the constipated mathematician do?
A: sat down and worked it out with a pencil
Q: what did the constipated mathematician do?
A: sat down and worked it out with a pencil
TurboSloth- Clan member
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Re: joke (not office friendly)
I have a few jokes to share too
Q: Why r camels known as the ships of the desert?
A: Because they r all full of arabian seamen
Q: Why r camels known as the ships of the desert?
A: Because they r all full of arabian seamen
Bobman- Clan member
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Re: joke (not office friendly)
Q: Why do camels spit?
A: Because there r no good looking arabian women around
A: Because there r no good looking arabian women around
Bobman- Clan member
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Location : Feilding
Re: joke (not office friendly)
Why wasnt Jesus born in Australia?
Couldnt find three wise men or a virgin..
Thats for claiming the All Whites as Australasian!!!
Couldnt find three wise men or a virgin..
Thats for claiming the All Whites as Australasian!!!
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